I want to be the change I’ve seen in the people around me.
One of my lecturers told me I lacked self-discipline. In the face. He wore a stern look and firmly asked me why I had been late for JAE (joint admissions exercise). I looked into his eyes and I saw disappointment. My heart trembled, tears were welling up and I thought, Why does he always look at me that way? Why is he so mean? Whatever, it’s okay to be late. It’s not that big of a deal anyway.
As he continued to speak, something sparked within me and I thought I caught fire. No I wasn’t embarrassed because there was so many people around me – everyone was too busy being involved in the competition for the top course in TES – it was realisation setting me on fire!
I’m still always late for everything! If I’ve been trying to be punctual as and when I wanted, then I haven’t actually suceeded in becoming a punctual person! I recall having promised myself, after a very unfortunate incident, that I wouldn’t be late for anything. Yes I have been punctual every now and then… but they don’t count. Everything in life has to be consistent otherwise it would have little significant impact or result.
Like swimming. If I swam occassionally, I wouldn’t swim as fast as I usually could if I’d trained on a consistent basis e.g. 4 times a week.
- I don’t want G to call me Miss Late anymore.
- I don’t want to be caught wearing slippers in class during Labs and then ‘Cut Class n’ Cry in the toilet’.
- I don’t want to be late for jamming and feel so guilty because I delayed everyone by an hour.
- I don’t want to be told off by some guy that I’ve got attitude problems and that late people like me wouldn’t be able to find a job in the future. (Dear H.K, I’m not referring to you. I’m glad you were honest with me 🙂 )
- I don’t want to send anyone wrong signals.
- I don’t want to run away from my problems because it just makes me feel even more depressed.
I want to be like
- my punctual classmates,
- my dilligent father,
- my tolerant mother,
- my kind brother,
- my understanding-happy-go-lucky-spirited lifesaving team mates,
- my monk who is always there,
- the confident spunky frontwoman Hayley Williams,
- the intelligent Natalie Portman and lastly,
I want to keep learning, keep believing in God, never lose hope so I will have that power to change.
Wah Lights inspired me to post this man. SINGGGGG THE LAST THING ON YOUR MINDDDDD